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Tuesday, May 31, 2011


Daddy taught Ana a new word - tuchus. Thank you, Daddy.

This word has presented issues, the two main being... 1) do you know how hard it is to Google how to spell tuchus? There are about 20 different variations. I finally settled on the spelling recommended on www.ObsessiveJew.com. I figured if anyone was obsessed about the word tuchus, then they probably knew how it was spelled.

The second issue presented itself when Ana took it upon herself to use her new word in every situation that she could:

Cooper, sit your tuchus down.

My tuchus wants to keep playing. It's not ready for bed.

I don't like this food. It tastes like a tuchus.

Hey, Mommy, Daddy, where are you two tuchuses going?

Yet again, I say Thank You, Daddy.

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Friday, May 27, 2011

Wash That Mouth Out!

Ana was playing with her dolls yesterday and I was listening to her chatter.

Damn! I forgot my dress. Dammit!

This was immediately followed by a cringe, then, Oops! I forgot that I'm not supposed to say that word.

I'm glad you caught yourself, I told her. That's an ugly word and we don't say that.

Yeah. We can't say that where anyone can hear us. We can only say it at our house.

Well, we can't even say it at our house. It's not good to say ugly words, even around our family.

Yes, but we can say it at our house if it's just The Bogles here.

Well, I'm a Bogle and I didn't like hearing it. We just don't say it at all.

Still looking for a loophole... Okay, but I can say it in my room with the door closed, in my closet with the door closed, if I turn out the light and you can't hear me.

Yes, I suppose you can. I suppose you can.

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Thursday, May 26, 2011

Little Voices Are The Loudest

We work constantly on using an inside voice in inside places. Sometimes it works, other times not. It's amazing how loud someone's whisper can be!

Last Sunday we were at church and Ana decided to stay with us to hear the music. The Reverend was giving his talk and I guess everyone must have looked slightly dazed because he asked, "Are you getting this? Are you hearing what I'm saying?"

Silence. And then one tiny voice (I'll let you guess whose) broke through the hush...


This new-to-us church seems to have a good sense of humor, so I think we will fit in just fine.

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Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Dance Face

Apparently I need to look in a mirror when I dance. Dancing with Ana yesterday:

Mommy, you make a mean face when you dance. I'm kind of scared.

Good thing I'm not trying to meet any guys anymore. Luckily my mean face appears not to have scared Scott away. Lovely.

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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

4 Year Old Theology

I love that my child is thinking about God, but dang her questions can get hard! Here is a list from ONE day:

1. Mommy, how did God make rocks?
2. Mommy, how did God make baby bottles?
3. Mommy, why does God let armadillos get squished?
4. Mommy, what does God think about mean people?
5. Mommy, what would God say if someone was mean to me?
6. Mommy, what does God think when Coopy eats the food off of the table?
7. Mommy, what does God say to the people in Heaven?
8. Mommy, what does God say about my bum hurting?

It's a bit hard to interpret God's thoughts on hurting bums. After all of that, Mommy needed a nap!

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Monday, May 23, 2011

Anatomy Lesson

We have a nightly ritual with Little Chick. After bedtimes stories, she will throw her little legs out from under the covers and we will kiss our way up, saying goodnight to various body parts -
Goodnight toes, Goodnight knees, Goodnight belly, etc.

Last night, in a desperate attempt to stall, Ana offered to do the same for me. I do not get out of bed as easily as I used to because increasingly it is like I am pinned down by a growing boulder. I also was tired, so the prospect of lying flat a little longer was a very attractive one, and I agreed.

(kissing toes) Goodnight toes

(kissing knees) Goodnight knees

(kissing thighs) Goodnight ribs

I believe someone has not been paying attention past the first few kisses each night...

On another note, If you bought over $150 worth of steak and then for the past two days have been put off by the thought of meat, you might also be pregnant. Again, not saying this has anything to do with me. Nope, not me.

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Saturday, May 21, 2011

You Might Be Pregnant If...

A guy comes to your door and says that he sells all natural, hormone and antibiotic, grass fed beef and just delivered a case to your neighbor and instead of saying, "Not Interested," you say, "You had me at Hello."

You then proceed to buy a case of beef - because you can get a better deal, but also because the sight of all that meat fills you with a great sense of satisfaction. You then wax poetic about how you are going to put lots of mustard and pickles on your hamburgers.

When the sales guy offers to show you the boxes of seafood or chicken, you stop him and tell him, "No, beef. Only beef."

He then carries your 6 boxes of steaks and hamburgers to the garage freezer, which now will not hold one item more.

You only realize that you might be slightly odd when you call your husband to tell him of your great purchase and he, the meat eater of all meat eaters, asks how you and he are possibly going to eat all of that meat in one year and what were you thinking?

If this happens to you, you might be pregnant. Not saying it happened to me, just saying if it happens to you...

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Friday, May 20, 2011

It's A...

Well, we had a bit of a surprise this morning!

On Tuesday my doctor had predicted 2 girls, but today I went to my other doctor who has a higher powered machine. Instead of 2 girls, we are having...


Both are wonderfully, perfectly healthy seeming, so I am so very, very grateful.

Ana is less than thrilled with the idea of a boy, but she said, "I will think about it and maybe I will learn to be flexible." She was already demonstrating her flexibility by saying that although she wanted the two girls to be named Holly and Molly, she supposed the one girl could just be named "Holly Molly". God save us!

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What's Cookin'?

Today is the day we find out for sure the gender of our little peanuts. I'll change this post by the end of the day to share the news. It's a crazy day today schedule-wise, so I'll probably be able to post in the late afternoon. Excited!!!

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Thursday, May 19, 2011

Can We Unlearn Some Things From School?

My lady has her last day of preschool today. It's been a wonderful class for her and she's learned a lot of randomness - the letters K, O, A, N, X, and probably some others that she's holding out on me; more than she needs to know about butterflies, ladybugs, and lava; and how to put two dots on a paper and call it a finished piece of art.

She's also learned some good old fashioned potty mouth insults. Those are the things that I wish we could return. Some of the insults are ones that probably came out of my mouth as a child, but she has definitely picked up some unique ones too.

Thursdays are show and tell days. One little guy in her class either brings his favorite blankie every week or he switches it up with something so totally out of the box that it must get the kids thinking. Last week was a turkey baster - "Sometimes I share this with my Mom."

Me being me, my first thought was not - How unique!. It wasn't - How funny!. Nope, I thought - God bless her, she actually cooks enough to be using a turkey baster and it's not even Thanksgiving? But, back to my story...

So, the kids were quite taken by the turkey baster. So taken in fact that yesterday I got this:

Ana, put your markers away - I'm going to read a story to you on the couch.

Okay, you turkey baster head!

Granted, it was probably not my best hair day, but turkey baster head? Now that's just insulting.

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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Lord of the Flies

Ana's school held a class party at our neighborhood park yesterday. The moms in charge did a fantastic job - pinata, pizza, goody bags, you name it. I had a lot of fun watching Ana play with her classmates and have a good time.

There is a little bit of construction going on at our park and the workers have set up a construction net around the area where they are working. This, of course, was a source of endless fascination to the kids. At one point I glanced over and saw a late thirties guy, bearded, sitting on the ground behind the fence eating his lunch. Probably trying to eat it in peace, but there were three children with their faces smashed up against the net talking to him. I figured I would shoo them off so that the poor guy could finish his sandwich in silence.

As I made my approach I figured I would hear the usual adorable 4 year old babble - What's in your sandwich? What are you building? I can build with blocks at my house! Not so much. It was more like this:

Hey Man! You're a baby face! Baaaaby face! Baaaaby face! You are a baby face! Eat your baby food, baby face!

I'm thinking we won't stand under that new pergola that he was building. If I were him I might be tempted to leave out a screw or two...

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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Old McMOMald

I realize that I am expanding by the day, but I am filing this under unnecessary cruelty. Ana's take on Old McDonald yesterday morning:

Old McMOMald had a farm, E-O-E-O-O
She's a moo-moo here and a moo-moo there
Here a moo, here a moo, everywhere a moo-moo
Old McMOMald had a farm, E-O-E-O-O

(uncontrollable giggling)

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Monday, May 16, 2011

Why Bother?

With the addition of a third anti-nausea medicine, I have been feeling somewhat "neutral", which has been waaaay better than my former standard feeling of clutch-the-toilet-bowl-all-day. Given that I am expanding at the rate of the national debt, I thought I would surprise Scott and Banana with a short trip to "Sanny Tonio" while I can still walk quasi-waddle-less. If all went well, we could do it again in the near future.

I planned for us to get into town, have dinner on the River Walk, then hit up the zoo the next day. One last dinner on the River Walk, and then back to Austin Sunday morning. In and out since I wasn't sure how it would go. My plan should have looked like this:

check into hotel
have a pillow fight
try the lotion sample
eat at the hotel
jump on the beds some more
go to sleep after turning all of the lights in the room on and off several times

go to the hotel breakfast buffet
back to the room for a pillow fight
jump around
check out the hotel TV
play with the lotion some more
lunch at the hotel
more pillow fighting
sneak a handful of free mints
dinner at the hotel
go to bed, laying on every pillow possible

hotel breakfast buffet
reluctantly check out of the hotel grabbing more mints on our way out of the lobby

That was about how impressed Ana was with any plan to leave the hotel. The entire trip to the zoo was peppered with, "Can we go back to our hotel now, please? I just want to go to our new home. I wish we could live in the hotel forever."

Next time I am saving the drive time and dough and we are checking in to some downtown Austin hotel. Ana will be in Heaven.

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Friday, May 13, 2011

Tough Job Market

Apparently Blogger is having issues and deleted my last post, but for those of you that did not get to see it, Ana is big into acting Trump-like at the moment. Another blow from the mini mogul today:

Mommy, did you get me chocolate milk?

No, Baby, I got you white milk. Sometimes we make chocolate milk at home, but we always get white milk when we are out somewhere.

Well, my daddy gets me chocolate milk...

Oh, he does? I didn't know that. Well, Mommy gets you white milk.

Then you're fired!

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Thursday, May 12, 2011

Mini Trump

Going through a drive through window, the order taker misheard my order and we had to pull back through to get what we actually ordered the first time.

Never one to be a shy violet, this is what Ana contributed from the back seat:

You're fired! You're fired! Oooh, oooh, you're fired! You're fired! You're fired! Oooh, oooh, you're fired!

I couldn't drive away fast enough...

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Wednesday, May 11, 2011


Ana and I were at a little pharmacy/market/lunch counter when the high school across the street let out for lunch. Apparently our location was the place for the alternative/vegan crowd so they started filing in, including one girl with freshly dyed pink hair.

(incredibly loud voice) Mommy! Look at that girl's hair! It's pink! She looks just like an Easter egg!

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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Shirt Snacks

1 Unexpected Sign of Pregnancy:

You take your clothes off at night and food crumbs fall out of your bra.

Hmmm... on second thought this could be that I have been hospitalization level sick and they finally found a medicine that makes me feel "neutral" and I have been making up for lost time...

... on third thought... this could be just me... wouldn't be the first time ;-)

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Monday, May 9, 2011

More Things I Never Thought I'd Say...

1. Ana! Take that straw out of your nose! Did you need a tissue? Your straw is for drinking, not for digging!

2. Oh, Honey, I'm sorry your poop hurts and won't come out. Come here, let Mommy rub your biscuits, that might help. That's because you're not eating enough vegetables; we'll have to give you more (always room for a lesson).

I ask you, who have I become???

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Sunday, May 8, 2011

Self Induced Haircut

Ana, what's wrong? Why are you holding your hands over your head? What did you do?

Ummm... a girl just gets curious sometimes...

Apparently a girl getting curious means that a girl likes to see what happens when she takes scissors to her head. We discussed the merits of being less curious, including that she still has a house to live in when she is less curious.

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Monday, May 2, 2011

Bunny Porn

Our neighborhood moms' group put on a really cute Easter egg hunt the day before Easter. There was a petting zoo, complete with fluffy (traumatized) bunnies, snacks, and copious amounts of goody-filled eggs.

There was also a highschool boy dressed as Mr. Easter Bunny himself and Ana was instantly besotted. It was more of an obsession really. She wanted to hold his hand. She wanted to sit by him on the bench. And she wanted to hug him. Super cute until her hugging became a bit more loving than necessary. She would wrap her arms around his side and then move them up and down. This was a tall highschooler and the point of contact between Ana arms and bunny was altogether inappropriate.

The whole family fun at the park scene ended with us dragging our protesting child away. I'm recommending a shorter bunny next year...

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