Home       Nokay What?       Mother Hen      Gallery       Greatest Hits       Contact

Greatest Hits - 23 months

1. You should be ashamed if you tell your child that she can’t drink your beer because it is “Mama’s milk”. You should be even more ashamed if the next time she sees a beer bottle she says “Mama! Meelk!” Mommy’s not saying that it was her or anything, though.

2. Ana has created a Britney Spears lookalike baby doll. She took a perfectly innocent looking Fisher Price doll, stripped her of her hat and all of her clothes. Off went the shoes. Then, through a break-in process, which included grabbing her hair by the fist full and slamming her on to the ground so that Ana could pick her up and say “Oh! It’s okay,” a Britney doll was created. We are thinking of branding and marketing her. Any takers?

3. Again – be careful what you start. Ana was making noises that sounded like Rosemary’s baby, so Mommy said “Are you a devil baby?” The little “angel” caught on to that right away. Now all we have to say is “Can you do devil baby?” and she will start to speak in tongues. This is okay if it only happens on command. Which it doesn’t. We are thinking that it is good that we can’t take her to church right now. All we need is the pastor to talk about resisting the devil. In the silence of the cavernous church, an eerie voice would start to chant: Aaaahhhh Uuuuhhhh Grrrrrrr

4. Chickie is having a rough time sharing these days. This includes the sidewalk with other walkers (she took a swing at a perfectly innocent looking woman just the other day). She also takes offense to the baggers at the grocery store. Apparently they have been stealing our groceries all along, we just didn’t know it. After ineffectively trying to explain to Ana that we will get our things back, we just try to cover for our protesting child by saying “Poor thing! It’s your nap time” or the ever-handy “Oh! Somebody must be hungry. She’s usually so pleasant…” We aren’t too sure that they’re buying it.