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Greatest Hits - 2 years 3 months

1. Out of the mouths of babes... Mommy was cuddling with the wee-one one morning when the little sprite wrinkled up her nose, pointed to Mommy's mouth, and said "Mommy, yecky mouwf." Can't really argue with that one, can you?

2. Our child is extremely spiritual. She will not only "bess you" for a sneeze, but coughs also get "bess you"s. Daddy is working on supressing his habitual morning cough as it is starting to get a little trying: Hack, hack "Bess you, Daddy!" 30 seconds later... Hack, hack, hack "Bess you, Daddy!" 30 seconds later... Hack "Bess you, Daddy!" and so on...

3. Ana and Santa are not good friends. They're not even casual aquaintances. Judging by the loot under our tree, Santa has no problems with Ana, it's Ana that has declared Santa her sworn enemy. We did the whole stand and watch the mall-Santa thing and that seemed to go well. Look, Honey! That little girl likes Santa! Look, Honey! She's telling Santa what she wants for Christmas. Oh, look! Santa's giving her a hug and a candy. What Ana took from that was that Santa would bring her shoes and purses (her presents of choice) and that if you sit on Santa's lap, you get a candy. Okay. Good enough.

Flash forward to the Heinz family breakfast, starring none other than the Big Red Man. Little Chick wanted nothing to do with the guy. It didn't help that he followed us around, peering at her over Mommy's shoulder, causing her to cling tightly like a little spider monkey. Finally it was our turn for the child-with-Santa-photo. All of the other kids were happily sitting on Santa's lap, setting a good example, so we had reason to be hopeful. Yeah, not so good. Mommy finally had to sit on Santa's lap herself, acting as a barrier between Ana and the offending red polyester.

Why is it that Mommy is always the only Mommy having to do these things? At Halloween Mommy rode in the pumpkin patch train with all of the other kiddies. At the mall, Mommy hoists herself onto a carousel horse so that Chickie isn't alone. And now, embarrassement of embarrassments, Mommy had to perch on Santa's knee at the company breakfast. What Mommy will not do for Chickie!

To make matters worse, the man had the gall to not pass out candy, our oft-repeated incentive for sitting on Santa's lap. It somehow seemed less effective when we told Ana, "Santa said we could take you upstairs in the elevator to get a special Santa candy from someone's desk because you were so brave to sit in his lap." Not so sure she made the connection there...