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Greatest Hits - 2 years 5 months

1. If you have glasses and live with a toddler, take them off. If you find out you need glasses, just leave them at the front door upon entering the house. Mommy found out that her Lasik had apparently hit its expiration point and that she needed to get glasses again. Her thrill and amazement at all that she could now see - leaves, blades of grass, etc. - quickly turned to dismay when she entered her house for the first time as a newly glasses-ed person. Film on wall. Food on floor. Handprints on window.

2. At some point we all must confront our fears. Ana's fear of the vaccum has been a spectacular excuse for letting cleanliness slide, however (reference the above point), Mommy's new perspective on the world meant that the dog hair sweaters in the corners could no longer be ignored. To tempt Ana into letting the big blue beast out of the closet, Mommy plied her with a cookie, perched her on the radiator, and put on the show of her life. Mommy pasted on an enormous smile and did her best impression of Ginger Rogers while using the vacuum. She got disgusted with herself, however, when she actually caught herself saying "Maybe when you're a big girl you'll be lucky enough to vaccuum..." Women's libbers everywhere let out a collective groan.

3. If there is a will, there is a way. Chickie has been forbidden from wearing her new Easter dress. To her it is just one more pink princess dress and therefore represents the Holy Grail, to be possessed at all costs. On a recent morning, Mommy's shower was disturbingly uninterrupted. After rushing through the motions, Mommy went to locate the little chick. She had let herself into the office (where the dress was hidden) and attempted to put the frock on. She did a pretty good job of it and Mommy was secretly impressed, that is until she spun Ana around and saw the hanger sticking out from her back. Almost...

4. Thank goodness for video monitors. The little angel was in clean jammies, tucked into bed. Over the monitor we hear the sounds of laughing and jumping. Taking our cues from the sounds, we would have just left her alone to jump it out and pass out. One click of the video screen, however, revealed that Ana had stripped off her footie pajamas and was rockin' out in her diaper. Daddy charged up the stairs to dress her again and settle her back down. He was met with an extremely self-satisfied child. As soon as he came into her room she announced: "I'n nakee. Oh my gorsh!" with a huge grin on her face.